Cricket, Food, and Buttocks

What a day it's been so far! In spite of the funny pain in my left bum (due to the humpty-dumpty fall yesterday), I decided to meet up with my friend at Churchgate for lunch. My left bum is mention worthy because it pains even more right now.

The reason it pains so much more: because I had to walk for about 50 minutes from Nariman Point to Churchgate (Actually, I was being carried toward Chowpatty by a mob) whilst being stepped on, and sometime groped, man-handled, etc. when ever I touched ground, and otherwise too, I think.

All I was trying to do was make way for me and my ill-ass to get some grub!

"Why oh why, for the love of gawd, did this happen?!" you may ask.

"'Coz of those dayam Indian T20 Heroes, I say!"

"Grr!"

But whatever... too bad (or good?) I hadn't read today's newspaper. I knew about the cricketers-parade happening today, but not about the time it would commence, or arrive at Marine Drive. Had I known their plan, I wouldn't have been there!

Here's what happened.

As soon as I approached the Air India building, I was enclosed in a beautiful traffic jam.


After chatting with my cab-walla for 10 minutes while the traffic snailed forward, I couldn't take it any more, so I decided to walk it up since my destination wasn't too far. After walking about 200m post the traffic jam start point, I see an array of all-male-rear at eye-level. I wondered about the excitement on the other side... (hehe!)


The curious cat that I am, I hopped across the road divider. And I had no idea the following was coming my way! Phew!

The Mob Approaches

It was a frenzy! Crazy fans jumbled up, plauditing, cheering, it was just CRAZY! And I was right in the middle of it all, with my right hand in the sky, not to wave at anyone, but to click pictures. It was such a rush! My left hand was busy trying to keep the crazy men off me, and with the other, I tried to keep it steady for my shutterbug.

Wow...this was something!

And finally, the heroes arrived.


Then zombies escorted the rich men to Wankhede.


By now I was shored to the car-park, where some people helped me not get squashed, or raped! Thank you. I realized, I'm not super-woman after all.


Well, that's why I was late for lunch. Now I'm back at work, and my left bum hurts. But I feel good!

;-)

Bike Potato

"Some people just can't keep to themselves!"

Ode to a Moron

There's a chap named Raavan
His job is to summon
Everyone in his little zoo to flock

He's hit town from Delhi
He says it's for the sake of his belly
Actually...
Everyone there refused to suck his boring cock

~

Ever since he's come to Mumbai
He's been on his ass, sippin gallons of chai
Playing a know-it-all-sonovabitch

He's oh-so-fickle
Prod him, he'll feel a tickle
Then get back to being an asshole
(he's an expert at which)

~

The dude needs to get on his paws
Explore the world, go break some (his) laws
And start afresh with a new perspective

Forever being in office has made him crazy
He can't think rationally; maybe he's lazy?
Or pro'ly he's gotta brain that's defective

~

Mirror mirror on the wall
Who's the most idiotic of 'em all?
Yup, that's right...it's faeces-faced Raavan

Go back you schmuck, then I'll croon hallelujah!
Take away all your muck, nobody here wants to do ya
Well, I've run my creative juices dry
Um..So I'll curtain this rhymey with Amen.